Monday, February 21, 2011


For a long, long time, a private voice had echoed
In the phone; a voice that had set something in me
Free; a voice that sounded like bliss; a voice that
Reeked of a secret language; a voice that talked and
Talked and talked, never pausing to listen, never…
How long has it been, since then? A summer and a
Winter? Will you be back this summer? For a while?
I do nothing these days; I read in the mornings, and
Then write for long hours perched at the dining table…
Mother says, it’s a long life, sixty years for everyone.
Drop a Hello, once in a while; a long tired breath for
Every call… it’s a long, long life darling and I do nothing
These days… at nights, I fancy the phone ringing, and
When I answer, it’s your punctuated breaths again…

Now Playing:: Iktara........Wake up Sid

Thursday, February 17, 2011


I could never lure him into loving me,
His taste in women was odd;
Emaciated cleavage with the bone
Sticking out, seldom made his gut rot.

You’re too much in love with me;
Shed it; undress; take charge of the skin;
Be a furry creature; ape the apes;
Please me, the way you please words…

That was once upon a time,
And I’ve loved other men since then,
Loved them the way I wanted to;
Loved without shame or rage.

Today, the equality of sexes bore me,
I long for my maazi, whose desire
Made me female, and my shy panicky
Submission that rendered him, male…

Yes, it breaks my heart to see others in love,
Yes, it breaks my heart to see myself
No longer awake, even in dreams…

Now Playing::Woh shaam kuch ajeeb thi...........Kishore

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

February Muse

During one of his kinky streaks, he asks me if
I could work the lather on his five o’clock shadow;
An ordinary man with saggy man-breasts and
Hirsute complexion and a brutally loveless face (that
brought me to him), how often, he seems so unattainable.
What am I growing into? A woman who can no longer find love?
I agree. Therefore, I try harder every day.

As I shunt in closer I feel his heat getting stitched
Into my breath, buzzing a dull fever in the folds of my anatomy.
Come to me. Stay.
The day wanes in the summer dust of his slurping slippers,
And the future unfolds like a Faustian bargain…

Now Playing::Om namaha............Gitanjali