In Search of Thyself

I know this blog lacks direction but the last thing that you can expect from its not so proud owner is a write-up on the much dreaded philosophy called " direction ". Even a soupcon of thought investment in this regard would have landed me amidst much verdure pastures that the Universe confers on most of its beings. But the status quo of my life is largely becoz of my being improvident and impulsive in all matters, and now i find myself facing the coulter of destiny, making slow and painful incisions, though not somatic yet dextrous enough to leave behind an ugly cicatrix, which never fails to remind me the futility of some of the decisions taken, regarding the few career options that i had got.


I prayed to become a doc and my family prayed for an engineering degree to such an extent that the poor universe got confused in the melee of prayers and one fine day i found myself treading the road less travelled; physics. It was largely becoz of this fall in life which deepened my respect for the power of gravity as the ego and self confidence suffered a major beating. And now, with the sophomore year coming to an end the coleoptile has reached its point of breakage, and will render its services for just another year, before leaving me all alone to face the world as it is. Employment seems out of question pro tem and i cant taste anything of its like before i earn a masters degree. There's however a great sense of delight in being alive and free from employment but the delight gets cankered when every specie that you spend is heavily questioned and the worst part of it is that people expect answers and no blank faces can ever bail you out of such sticky wickets.


At times however, i regret the decision of not studying engineering especially when i see most of my friends getting placed and discussing their humunguous pay packages on social networking sites. Suddenly every aera gera nattu khera is an engineer these dayz, courtesy the ever mushrooming private colleges in our state. And of course there's this thing called eM Bee A. Well back in Jan of this year i did attend a couple of demo classes and these are some of the facts which i discovered about myself

1. i'm good at maths and english
2. exceptionally poor in logic and reasoning
3. i love group discussions ( khud ki tareef thoda karlun: i actually scored the highest in one of the gds, where i had to defend pollution, and not to mention that they have been pestering me ever since to join )
4. there's hardly any fervour left in me to pursue an mba or to make money for that matter
5. i am too much in love with my subject that i cannot possibly dump it for anyother branch of knowledge no matter how lucrative it might be, and
6. i hardly have the patience to waste my mind on too many things n i'm really bad at providing solutions, so it would never make me a good manager anyway

So you can scarcely concieve how much the initial disappointment of not getting into a medical college, the resulting anguish, and the current studies have affected my thought process. Still clueless about what the future holds for me, but there's no point in thinking about the future if i cease to enjoy the present.



LOST!!


Now Playing:: Breathless...........................The Corrs