December Musings & Happy 21st

Ah! these December evenings………the world shut out, and individuals wrapped in warm raiment, yet, feeling a blast of that master feeling; cold and numb, ah, how it nips and shrinks me! Dreams, perplexity, the faint moonlight, and the cold ghost of the sun, you cannot ask for a better month to be born under. I can’t thank you enough mom.

Mistake, me not, reader, for it isn’t my birthday today, I just happened to realize that I did not celebrate my 21st in this space, which is something ‘new’ that my profile has been screaming since a couple of weeks. O, yeah babes, welcome to the ‘twenty-something’ clan!


Ok, I hope I’m not advancing a paradox, when I say that, after an intervention of 21 years, one may have leave to love oneself, without the accusation of self-love? Nah, not narcissistic either; but it is very fantastical and contradictory in human nature that we should love ourselves above all the rest of the world, and yet never endure to be with ourselves! STRANGE! At 21, in a certain sense, I hope it may be said of me that I am a lover of my species. I can feel for all indifferently, but I cannot feel towards all equally. Can’t help it, 2005 has made me so! You know, at times, a trumpet does not more stun you by its loudness, than a whisper, which keeps teasing you, with its provoking inaudibility. Getting entangled in another man’s mind, even as you lose yourself in his grounds is a lot easier, but the need to get out of the frequent doses of his thoughts would reduce you to imbecility. Intimidation, the word spells horror!


Hey hi! So you are still reading this! You must be Jesus then!


Honestly, this post was intended to document my short-short trip to Delhi, and the reasons why I hate traveling so much, and why air-journeys suck big time! Gosh! Did you say claustrophobia? Sounds nice, but not nice enough for an experience, I prefer Indian Railways! Flying is only the last, and I suspect, the least interesting, of numerous methods of locomotion. O, yeah, I’m not “air-minded”………..standing on the earth, not rapt above the sky!


Well then, readers, since I’m hardly in a state of writing anything else, I better take your leave, for I need to lay hands on my midnight darlings………

Now Playing:: Do lafzon ki hai…………..Asha

p.s: what kind of a post is this?

Hum Tum

To all the people in love, this is a single woman requesting you to clap an extinguisher upon your ironical behavior, if you are unhappily blest with a vein of it! To begin with, spare me the lectures on those superior pleasures which you tell me I have lost by remaining as I am, for, if you do that again, I swear, nothing would be more disconcerting than to sit down, so to speak, before your disciple (self-proclaimed, that too), and then suddenly to receive his boot in the pit of your stomach. Boy! I so wish to do that some day!


Oh puhleeze I’m none of those jealous singles who puke at the sight of lovely couples, indeed what makes me mad is that they are, ‘too loving’. Not too loving neither: nah that does not explain my meaning. Besides, why should it offend me if they prefer one another to the rest of the world? Dear Reader, you might ask, “yaar tera problem kya hai?”, and sadly, I’ve arrived at that station in life where I can actually script an answer to that question and a hundred others which have been chasing one another for sometime now.


Nothing is to me more distasteful than the way people carry that predilection for each other, and they won’t even mind perking it up on the faces of us single people so shamelessly, that you cannot be in their company a moment without being made to feel that you are not the object of a similar predilection. And they’ll keep telling you in little speeches and looks that you are not a happy man/woman, the (lady/man)’s choice. Good god! When will these guys realize that it is enough that I know I am not, and I scarcely am in need of this perpetual reminding.


Yet another infirmity that comes into observation is the manner in which your friends treat you. It doesn’t come across in all occasions but in a tête-à-tête, there is no shuffling, and the truth is out. A few days back one of my very good friends happened to meet this guy who had a thing for me back in junior college. And boy! Didn’t he ask about me! Of course he did, and his queries were no different from the usual ones. Like, what’s she doing and whether she’s still single and blah blah blah. Readers, tell me how difficult is it to answer those questions if you know a person way too well? The first one is obvious and the second one is equally obvious, but nah my friend thought otherwise. There was no ‘yes’ or ‘no’ in my friend’s answer but a whole lot of crap like, “you know how she is”, and I bet each word in that sentence must’ve been stretched a tad too much. I wouldn’t have written this post had the reply been, “no she has none; nor wishes either.”


Anyway I don’t wish to write anymore, coz to enumerate them all would be a vain endeavor, and the world would continue to provide us with the uneasy feelings which we derive from knowing ourselves to be less the object of love and esteem with a fellow creature than some other person is!

Now Playing:: Beeti na bitaye raina………………..Parichay

p.s: hey this is what Gulzar says for this song

Pancham se ek parichay woh tha jisse main tees saal jiya hoon aur, bhar poor jiya hoon poori sargam ke saath. Sangeet ke toh sirf saat hi sur hain magar Pancham ki shaksiyat mein bepanah sur the aur saare ke saare hum ne ek saath jiye. Ab yeh ek aur parichay hai uski chup ka jo tabhi beetega jab main beet jaunga………

That Old Feeling!!

Ah! That old feeling!
Takes a flutter and then settles down again.
Comes creeping on, now halting,
Now whimpering and shivering,
Wrapped in patches of nebula
And rags of mist.
Ah! That old feeling!
At the first gasp of love’s latest breath,
The pulse failing and the eyes dancing,
Dying embers finding a new life,
And former love; dissolved.
Ah! That old feeling!
But, oh dear,
Life is such a muddle,
The will is so weak, and
The sensations fidgety…

Now Playing:: Tumne mujhe dekha…………Rafi

p.s:: No wonder, Burman is back on my playlist.