Life Mein Kabhi Kabhi...

“ I feel I shall remember him to the last day of my life. He would haunt me perpetually. I am like a woman who has been falling in love unknown to herself, which she finds out when the man has left the lady forever.” Ah me! I thought they were high and great emotions.

Period.

Well readers, its just too difficult to document the reasons of my absence from this space and with a mind almost atrophied by the lack of use, things are getting too heavy to lift. Moreover, scattered wits do take a long time in picking up; and often, before I had got them together, they would get dispersed in all directions by some stray thoughts. You realize that a mind thus constructed is partially lame or torpid, with the sensations and infirmities all at rest. But, having said that, there’s also a queer feeling of happiness dwelling within for reasons probably known and unknown.

There were little twinges of panic too. Not the panic of being lost or lonely, but the sudden panic of being “complete”. I know, documentation of this kind is difficult to comprehend par kya karen, emotions and words do not hang together. Ah! Where can I find all those flutes and saxophones amidst the furniture of “words.”

Its strange that I should be in want of phrases to express, when “real” life doesn’t require any. Its probably those little smarting sensations in the brain which come when one has made peace with oneself ( though temporary ), and destroyed every vestige of past vanities.

Maybe, I’ve managed to return to this space as a healthier being.

Now Playing:: Deewana hua badal………..Rafi & Asha